“You know, Julie, the other evening as I sat alone dreaming
of days gone by…”
“Sure, Curmudge, and smoke rings would have been swirling
around your head except for the fact that you never smoked.”
“I dreamed of the girl that I used to know…”
“That would have been the late Mrs. Curmudgeon.”
“Right, Julie.
I was thinking of the qualities that she had that are no longer a part
of my life.”
“And because I can read your mind, Old Geezer, I know that
those are the very same qualities that one seeking a mate should be looking
for. That’s why we’re sharing
this—for other people—most certainly not you.”
“Most certainly.
So here’s the list; they may bring back fond memories to many of my
senior citizen neighbors:
Companion
Qualities: The Non-Procreative Aspects of Having a Spouse
or
‘Significant Other’
Regular, but not constant, companion. Always accessible when needed.
Emotional companion.
Sharing the beauties of travels, music, etc. Sharing the joys and sorrows of health. Sharing successes and failures.
Consultant on most everything in life. Living location and space. Food. Clothing.
Interactions with people, from children* to business. Making decisions.
Honest, constructive critic on everything from behavior to
quality of work.
Doer of things for one that can’t be done alone. Example: Changing a bandage in the
middle of one’s back. Driving one
home after a colonoscopy.
Provider of support, emotional and physical (e.g., putting
up a picture).
Participant in the duties of a household.** Meal preparation. Shopping. Putting out the trash.
Maintaining a mutually acceptable level of neatness.
Financial companion.
Assist in setting goals, paying debts, and sharing of financial
responsibilities.
Communicator.
Keeping lines of communication open and life on an even keel. Meeting appointments and obligations.
Amateur diagnostician.
Being ‘Doctor Mom.’
Forgiver for most indiscretions.
Maintainer of own individuality.
Mind-reader and flexible negotiator.
Capable of developing common interests if they don’t already
exist.
Able to resolve or accommodate differences in religion &
politics, if they exist.
_____
Notes:
*We assume that children, if any, are grown.
**Only meaningful if a physical household exists.
For anyone using these
notes in selecting a mate and who has achieved a modicum of success up to now,
a prenuptial agreement is mandatory.”
“That’s a petty good list, Curmudge.”
“Maybe, Jaded Julie, you should sit down with your laid-back
husband and discuss how well the list fits the two of you. Of course, don’t try that when there’s
a football game on TV.”
Kaizen Curmudgeon
Link to posting from blog archives: Patient Safety—Falls 2/12/09
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